Living in the "now" is a good wrestle; tiring, molding, and satisfying. My "now" spans boundless time, days on end, carrying very little stress, and bringing constant quiet. My past, pounding to-do list has shaped me much more than I realized. At first, I thought that I had forgotten how to be fully present, how to breathe worship. On second thought, maybe I never found that heart.
For me, its tough not to live in the past; those experiences that have shaped. Its difficult to not live in the future; those possibilities that are unknown. I hide in piling on the projects, reorganizing that closet for the umpteenth time, and refining some sort of method. Right now, the "now-here" is where God has placed me. Saying this out loud is one thing, but claiming peace while speaking it has been a tough chew.
Journey with me. Let go of the habitual thinking of, "Wow, it must be nice to be YOU....". We cheapen each other's journey in this thought. Worse, we discount our own.
My prayer is to be here, now--which asks me to look full into the face of Christ, to see His passion for me, to see His heart, to trust completely. Lord, grant me the courage to be in the now-here, with fullness of heart. Teach me to abide.